When we launched our Fire Walk fundraiser last month, Graham was one of the first people to sign up. Here, he tells us what inspired him to take on the fiery challenge.

“St Wilfrid’s cared for my mum, Julie, for the last few days of her life. I was so grateful for the care and attention they gave her that when I was sitting at the hospice waiting for my son to finish his first counselling session and saw a leaflet about the Fire Walk, I thought ‘why not give it a go’. I felt that by raising some money for the hospice I was able to give something back, even if it does mean walking on hot coals!

Last April, Mum had been poorly with what we thought was a chest infection and pulled muscles. So, to find out she had metastatic lung cancer that had spread to her liver, kidney, lymphs and bones was unthinkable.

Sadly, just a couple of weeks later we were told no more could be done. Her palliative care team at the hospital said they would try and get a bed in St Wilfrid’s, but warned us that due to shortages it may not happen. Fortunately, I received a call a few days later to say that a bed had become available, so Mum was moved into the hospice for end of life care.

Being at St Wilfrid’s made such a difference compared to being in hospital. It was so calm, which made us and Mum feel more settled, and everyone was so polite and professional. Nothing was too much trouble. Mum had her own room with amazing views of the garden, and her bed could be moved so she could look out.

She was unable to eat and swallow solid food towards the end. The staff and volunteers however continued to meet her unique requests with a variety of drinks. Visiting hours were unrestricted, and there was no limit to the number of people allowed to visit at one time.

Her family felt really well supported. The staff were great – always there to listen, no matter how small or silly the questions were, they answered as much as possible. I was comforted knowing Mum felt safe at the hospice, she knew quite a few team members from when she worked in the community, and they would pop in and have a little chat and giggle. And she loved the foot massages!

St Wilfrid’s offered a safe space for my young sons to visit, too. They felt comfortable with the hospice surroundings as it did not have that hospital feel or appearance, and was not noisy and as busy.

In total, Mum spent six days at St Wilfrid’s, and I stayed with her from when she went downhill to her passing. Everyone was there for me as well as her right to the end. But the hospice’s support didn’t end there – it is still ongoing. Counselling was offered for myself, Mum’s partner and my son, which brings me back to Fire Walk.

I am so grateful to St Wilfrid’s for everything they did for Mum to ensure she was as comfortable as possible. From the first time walking through the hospice doors to now, I can’t thank you all enough, you have all been amazing! Now I’m looking forward to completing the Fire Walk in March and raising as much money as possible for such a great charity.”

Pictured: Graham’s Mum Julie with her grandchildren 

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