On Friday 29th March St Wilfrid’s Hospice held its first Jail and Bail fundraising event, where 16 of the area’s best-known community figures, politicians and entrepreneurs spent the morning behind bars at the historic Redoubt Fortress to raise funds for the hospice.   

Each prisoner was asked to stump up £1,000 in bail money for St Wilfrid’s – or else face a lengthy prison stay!

By 9am, an angry mob had gathered to watch officers and cadets from Eastbourne Police make the official arrest of Eastbourne’s most wanted.

Next, the gang was called forward for fingerprinting, to have their mugshots taken and to hear the (entirely fictitious!) charges made against them.

Among the crew’s nefarious deeds were Keith Ridley’s (ex editor, Eastbourne Herald & Gazette) crimes against grammar, Stephen Lloyd MP’s longstanding ploy of using clones to be seemingly everywhere in Eastbourne, and Lee Howard’s (Payne & Sons Funeral Directors) dad dancing. 

Armed only with their phones, the prisoners were led to a cell to do their ‘time,’ as they phoned, tweeted and Snapchatted in a last-ditch attempt to secure more sponsorship money from friends, families and followers.

Collectively the motley gang of hospice hooligans hustled, begged and borrowed - both in the run-up to the event and on the day itself - to meet the event’s £16,000 fundraising target. What a runaway success it’s been!